When Reality Becomes Illusion (Free Write #1)

I lie on my back staring at the ceiling, the world spinning around me.  My consciousness disintegrates, merging with my surroundings.  My chest feels like it's burning and constricted as my heart pounds beneath the flesh.  I can't breath; the color drained from my lips.  My limbs are cold and clammy; I can barely make a fist.  Nothing can still my mind and ease the fear.  Even held in a loving embrace I remain disconnected, yet simultaneously a part of everything in existence.  It's too easy to just let go and allow myself to sink under; a fallen victim to distress and tragedy.  I can't stop moving.  I won't stop moving.  Don't let yourself drift away.  Keep looking into his eyes.  Remain conscious.  Deep breaths.  Relax.  You'll make it through this...I'm slipping away.  I can't surrender.  Could this really be it?!?  Fear floods through me once more making every second seem like an eternity of unbearable torture.